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Send
humorous insults to
your enemies, friends, or family |
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|
Step
1: Choose an insult to send. |
 you went to a haunted house and came out with an application. [send] at birth, your parents named you Shit Happens. [send] your mate won't have to worry about birth control...your face will do just fine. [send] you could model for death threats. [send] when you were born they put tinted windows on your incubator. [send] you have to sneak up on your mirror. [send] when you look in the mirror your reflection turns to stone. [send] when you sit in the sand the cats try to bury you. [send] your doctor is a vet. [send] when you were born the doctor took one look at you and slapped your parents. [send] you stuck your head out of the car window and got arrested for mooning. [send] your pet name is Scooby-Doo. [send] you have to Trick or Treat by phone. [send] when your mother went into labor your father went into shock. [send] every time your mother looks at you she says to herself, "Damn, I should've [send] when we play peek-a-boo - first I peeked, then I booed. [send] you can sink your face in dough and make monster cookies. [send] they call you Taco Bell, when people see you they run for the border. [send] you make onions cry. [send] the tide wouldn't bring you in. [send] I took you to see the zookeeper and he said, "Thanks for bringing him back." [send] you mother had to get drunk before she breast fed you. [send] you went to a freak show and got a permanent job. [send] the police sketch artists are afraid to draw you [send] when you get sick they call the vet. [send] you make blind kids cry. [send] farmers use your picture as a scarecrow. [send] every time you go out you get chased by the dog catcher. [send] you can't hail a bus. [send] they call you Moses because every time you step in the lake, the water parts. [send] you give Freddy Kruegger nightmares [send] they let you park in handicapped spaces. [send] when you threw a boomerang it didn't come back. [send] when you went to the zoo they refused to let you out. [send] you can't get a date off the calendar. [send] when your mother went into labor the doctors went on strike. [send] your last name is Link and your first is Missing. [send] people put your picture in their car window as an anti-theft device. [send] that you can turn milk into yogurt, just by looking at it. [send] people create a Jackson Pollock style painting when they spew on the floor. [send] your dog has to close its eyes when it humps your leg! [send] when you go to the zoo the monkeys take pictures of you! [send] when you were a baby your mom fed you with a sling shot! [send] your mom had to breast feed you with a garden hose! [send] your mom has to tie a steak around your neck just to get the dog to play with you. [send] that, when you were born, the doctor didn't know which end to slap! [send] you didn't get hit with the ugly stick -- you got hit with the whole damn tree! [send] a garbage man picked you up and threw you into the truck. [send] You're so ugly, when you pass by the toilet, it flushes itself. [send] you look like a bunch of retards trying to hump a door knob [send] |
